is love always this hard
by NCISrules101
Summary: can lisbon and jane make love work or will there always be things and people who get in the way.
1. Chapter 1

**hey this is my first mentalist story hope you guys like it. all the mistakes are my own and if you find any please let me know and ill fix them. please review and tell me what you think. writing chapter two at the moment, dont know how long it will take to upload but i will try my best to do it reguarly. thanks for reading.**

She knew it was a bad idea as soon as he told her what he wanted to do, but she couldn't help it, there was just something about the way his eyes would slightly light up at the prospect of catching a killer. That all she could do was nod her head, and let him get on with his elusive plan, while following silently behind. She knew that it was going to either get her or him into trouble, and then she would be the one that would have to fix all the trouble he caused but she did it anyway.

So here they were sitting in Minelli's office after it all happened. But she did have to admit it didn't go as badly as she thought it would, but still I didn't end well, but then again it never did when Jane was involved. And to be fair he did catch the killer, even if it was someone we didn't want it to be. Lisbon turned her attention back to Minelli.

'so let me get this straight, you and Jane went and got yourself kidnapped, put into a crate, driven into a dessert in the middle of Mexico, managed to get out of it, to then walk into a court room and disrupt a trial, all so that you could question both the judge and the DA. Is that about right?' He voice getting slightly more angry as he went, and all that Lisbon could do was nod her head and look to Jane with a pissed off look, but he simple smiled at her and turned back to Minelli, who just nodded his head stood and then continued.

'Well know that we have that all sorted out, congratulation on solving the murder. It's never a good day when you have to send someone who you have known for years to prison but when you have to you have to there's nothing you can do about that. Now go home guys get some rest and you can finish your reports tomorrow.' And with that he closed the file and put it in his out tray. Lisbon stared at him for a moment, and then turned to Jane, who had already stood and was waiting for her. Still completely in shock, she stood slowly and followed Jane like she always did until they were in her office. Once Lisbon was in her office Jane closed the door behind him and shut the blinds to give them a little privacy in case anybody walked past. He turned away from the door and noticed Lisbon just standing there staring at him. He took a step towards her before saying,

'Hey are you alright.' He locked eyes with her, to show that he was genuinely concerned. She kept the gaze for a couple of seconds, before breaking it and stepping away from him, and moving towards her desk and sitting behind it. She still hadn't replied to his question, and she really didn't want to, as she knew if she lied to him and said she was fine then he would call her a liar and get her to tell him what was really wrong, or she would tell him the truth and have him question her about it, and she really didn't want that, it was a lose-lose situation. So deciding that it was probably best just to tell him the truth she began.

'No I'm not alright. Why must you always do that Jane? You don't even seem to notice what you're doing to the team, what you're doing to me. It's like you don't even care most of the time. Please tell me Jane, why do you do it?' she looked at him again at the end to get the point across. Jane just stared at her for a couple of minutes, taken aback slightly at the honesty she was giving him, before taking a seat opposite her, so deciding that it was probably best to be completely honest back he replied.

'I'm so sorry Lisbon, I didn't mean for my action to make it seem that I didn't care about the team. And most certainly didn't care about you. Because I do care, I care more than I thought possible. Since I came to this team, I've learnt a lot about myself and that all thanks to the team and the most importantly you. But I'm not sorry for doing all the things in a case because usually it catches the bad guys, I'm just sorry that I seem to lose more and more of your trust when I do it.' All through his confession, Lisbon sat dumbfounded at his honesty and wasn't really sure what to say back, but she didn't get a chance to reply as Jane continued.

' but I meant what I said earlier, I will always try to save you, I don't know why, maybe it because I'm usually the one to get you into trouble, but on another level something inside me tells me that I have to do it. And to be honest I don't mind doing it at all.' After saying this Jane rose from the chair and walked around her desk to stand next to her. Lisbon wasn't sure why she did it but she stood and turned to face him, they were so close together that she could feel his breath on her face. They just stood there staring at each other, trying to convey everything they wanted to say to each other but couldn't through their eyes, after a couple more seconds Jane couldn't help himself and he lent forward closing the space between himself and Lisbon.


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer; if i owned the mentalist my world would be a much more happy place.

heres the new chapter guys, hope you like it. once again the mistakes are all mine, and if you find any please tell me and i will correct them. thanks for the reviews guys please keep them coming they make my world just that bit happier :)

Their faces were an inch away, when there was a knock at the door and they both sprung apart as if they had been burnt. Lisbon shock herself to get back in control before sitting back behind her desk and motioning Jane to go sit on her couch. Once he had moved away from her she called to whoever had interrupted them to come in. the door opened slowly to reveal a slightly apprehensive looking Van Pelt. Once she was in the office she nodded to Jane before turning back to Lisbon and saying.

'Sorry if I'm interrupting but I just wanted to give you my reports before I headed home.' Lisbon nodded her head before reaching her hand out for the reports, Van Pelt walked towards her desk handed her the paperwork, before saying a quick goodnight and walking as quick as she could out of the office. Lisbon looked at the closed office door for a minute before turning to Jane who was lying on the couch with his eyes closed. She knew he wasn't sleeping but she didn't really want to say anything to him yet, without thinking through what nearly happened between them, so she decided to leave him 'sleeping' and read the report that Van Pelt had given her, even though Minelli had told them to go home, she didn't really feel like going home to an empty house, so Turning to the first page, and taking her time reading every single word carefully, just so that she could waste time.

Jane could feel Lisbon's eyes on him when Van Pelt left, but he didn't want to move or even open his eyes, because he knew that she wouldn't want to talk about what just happened, before probably thinking it through, so he just continued to keep his eyes close, and also think about it too. He felt her shift her eyes away, then heard her open the report and began to read. Jane felt himself start to drift off after a couple of minutes.

Lisbon was almost through with the report, when she drifted her gaze away from the report and back to Jane, who had been very quiet the last 10 minutes, she noticed he was breathing evenly and knew he was sleeping. She let herself stare at him for a while. He looked so peaceful while he was asleep; the worry of the world had disappeared from his face. Something inside Lisbon clicked and she couldn't help herself, dropping report to the side, she rose from her desk and walked to stand next to him. Looking down at him, gave her the a sense of protectiveness, and she wasn't sure why she had done it but she knelt next to him and ran her fingers across his head, tracing the slight lines that she could now see being closer to him. As her fingers danced across his face, he stirred slightly, she had forgotten what such a light sleeper he was, she drew her hand back quickly but it was too late she had already been caught. He turned his head towards her, and she got lost in his beautiful sea-blue eyes, they were still slightly closed due to sleep. As soon as he realized who had woken him, he smiled and she couldn't help but smile in return, even though she was worried about what he might say about the way she had waking him up the way she did. But she didn't need to worry because he didn't say anything just kept staring at her with a smile. He was the first to brake the gaze by sitting up on the couch, and stretching out his muscles, she didn't know how he never seemed to have a bad back after laying on the couch, but didn't dwell on it, because he had stood and was holding his hand out to her to help her stand, usually she wouldn't have taken the hand, being an independent women that she was, but as it was the hand of the dashing consultant, she grabbed hold and heaved herself up. Once she was standing opposite him, she tried to take her hand away from his, but he wouldn't let her and entwined his fingers with her. Her first reaction was to pull away, but something about the warm hand, made her think twice, and she didn't pull away. The next thing she knew she was being dragged out of her office and into the bullpen, she noticed that neither had spoken, but she didn't mind, it felt nice not having to say what was on her mind.

Jane walked into the bullpen and let go of her hand and she instantly missed the touch, she watched him walk over to his couch and grabbed his jacket off the back of it. She took the time to look around the bullpen and noticed that her team had already left for the night. She turned her attention back to Jane, who walked straight past her back to her office, he was in there for about 10 seconds, when he walked out he was carrying her coat and purse, he switch the light off and locked the door, he walked back towards her coat thrown over his arm and her purse in one hand, his other hand stretched out towards her. She took a step towards him and grabbed the outstretched hand, he entwined their hands once again, turned to the exit dragging Lisbon along with him. They got to the elevator, because Lisbon was the only one with a free hand, she pressed the button down. The elevator arrived and they both stepped into it, once the doors closed, Lisbon took a step closer to Jane so that there was no space between them.


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer: no I don't own the mentalist, the possibilities if I did though would be awesome .**

**Hey guys I got this one up quicker than normal, once I started writing it seem to just flow out of me, I doubt ill be able to get every chapter up this quick but I will try. Thanks for all the reviews I will reply to them when I get time. Please enjoy the new chapter.**

The elevators door opened, and Lisbon stepped away from Jane and headed towards her car, Jane was only a step behind her. Once she reached her car she turned to Jane, who came to a stop within inches of her, she could feel his body heat, and shivered slightly. For the first time since she had woke him up, she spoke.

'Well apart from the little adventure we had today.' She gave him a pointed look, but all he did was give her, his charming smile, which she always found hard to resistible. She smiled slightly back before continuing.

'Well done on catching the killer even if you didn't do it in the right way like always. It's been a very entertaining day. But know I'm just going to head home have a nice relaxing bath, enjoy your night off.' She gave him one last smile, before turning away to head to the front seat. She was stopped abruptly by a hand grabbing hers, and turning her swiftly. The next thing she knew she was pressed into a warm chest. She was slightly shocked at first and tried to pull away, but he tighten his hold on her. She dint really have any other choice so she wrapped her arms around his waist, relaxing into the touch. It felt weird at first as they have never really been this close before, but after a couple of seconds she started to feel comfortable with the touch. All too soon Jane pulled away from her and stepped away and headed towards his car, and said a goodnight over his shoulder. Lisbon stood there shocked for a couple of seconds before turning around and saw Jane car leaving, shaking her head, confused as hell, and opening the door and starting the car.

She drove home on autopilot; she was paying more attention to her thoughts then the road ahead of her. She was thinking about the day they just had, and more importantly Jane. She couldn't wrap her head around why he had done it, and more importantly why she hugged him back. Thinking back to the hug, she realized how safe she felt in his arms for the first time since her mother had died, and she wasn't use to it. It made her scared at the thought. She didn't get much more time to think about it as her house came into view, and she saw Jane's Citroen in front of her house. Pulling her car behind his, she got out of the car and locked it. Turning away from the car she saw Jane sitting on the steps in the front of the house. Taking a deep breath to calm her nerves, she walked towards him. When she was a few steps away from him he lifted his head and meet her gaze. She looked into his eyes and saw a lot behind them. He seemed nervous about something and she wasn't sure what, there was also something behind them that she thought she would never see in his eyes that were directed at her. Thinking that she had made a mistake she shifted her eyes away from his and stepped around him to open her door. She walked into her house and left the door open knowing that Jane would follow her in.

When Jane had stepped away from Lisbon in the car park, he felt slightly better with himself, with the step he had just taken with Lisbon. He had been slightly worried that she would have laughed in his face at the bold move. But when she had pulled away and didn't laugh him, he wasn't about the let her get away from him so he tighten his hold. He was slightly shocked that she returned the hug after that, but that was what put him in the mood he was in now. When he reached his car, he didn't really want to go home, so he decided to go for a drive.

Before he realized where he was going, he was pulling up at Lisbon's house, slightly shocked that he had driven here without thinking. He turned the engine off and went to wait on the steps. While he waited for Lisbon to arrive, he fiddled with the ring on his finger; thinking about his wife always upset him. But as he sat there he came to realized that even though he still loved his wife, he couldn't keep living his life like he was. He heard Lisbon's car, and because he had just come to that conclusion, he turned the ring around his finger one last time before taking the ring off and putting it in his pocket, it felt like a weight had been lifted of his shoulders. He heard Lisbon walking up the pass and lifted his head, he meet her gaze and tried to convey his emotions through his eyes. He saw confusion in her eyes at why he was here. He saw her shake her head slightly before breaking eye contact with him and stepped around him. She had left the door open, taking that as an invitation; he flexed his left hand one last time. Before standing and following her in, closing the door behind him as he entered.

By the time Jane had entered her house; she had slung her coat over the back of the couch and put her purse on the table. When she heard the door close behind her, she turned to face him, she asked.

'Would you like a drink, a cup of tea or something?' When he nodded his head, she went into the kitchen to start the drinks. She filled the kettle with water and turned it on. Opening the cupboard to grab some mugs, she filled one with a tea bag and the other with coffee. Once that had been sorted she turned to notice Jane, and saw that he had taken refuse at her kitchen table, being very silent and in his own thoughts. She was about to ask if he was ok, when the kettle finished boiling, she turned back around, to get the drinks. When they were ready she took a seat opposite Jane and handed him his drink, he just nodded his head as a thanks and took a sip. She took a sip of her own drink before asking.

'So Jane is everything ok.'

tbc


	4. Chapter 4

Disclaimer: nope still not owning the mentalist. My life is still the same as it was yesterday.

Hey guys heres the next chapter for you, hope you enjoy it like the rest of my chapters. Mistakes are still mine. Enjoy guys.

When she asked the question, she kept her gaze on the man in question. He didn't look up he just kept staring into his cup of tea, she wasn't sure whether he was ignoring her or really just thinking over the question she asked. She was going to give him a couple more seconds before she asked him again. Tearing her eyes away from Jane to look down at her coffee, the warm dark liquid seemed to calm her nervous down a little, but when she lifted her head to look at Jane again the nerves came flooding back, he seemed so broken, so turn between something. Taking another sip of her coffee she decided the silence was too hard to bear any longer.

'Jane.' and when he still didn't reply, she thought she would try something she didn't really do. Reaching forward, she let her fingers brush against one of his hands that were wrapped around his mug. Jane flinched slightly at the touch before lifting his head from the mug. Lisbon saw the look in his eyes and she was slightly taken back from it. She was just drawing her hand back when his grabbed a hold of her wrist and threaded his fingers through hers. More concerned than shocked at his movements, she turned her gaze towards their hands, without really thinking about what she was doing just going with the feel of the atmosphere; she started to rub her thumb along his knuckles, just to show that she was there for him and that she cared. She once again lifted her gaze back to his eyes, and saw that he too was staring at their hands.

She let him think for a while, even though she wasn't as good at reading people like he was, but she knew that he was trying to shift through his thoughts, trying to get them in check before telling her. She looked down at their hands again, and noticed that she had a hold of his left hand, and that her thumb was brushing against his fingers, but she couldn't feel the cold metal that should have been on his ring finger. She started to think about when he had decided to take of his wedding ring, but didn't get too far in that thought as Jane had started talking.

When Jane had closed the door, he turned around to face Lisbon, and saw her sling her coat over the back of her couch, and when she had done that she had turned back towards him. He didn't bother moving away from the door, as he knew she was about to ask the question that everyone asks when someone was in their house. And she didn't disappoint him; she asked if he would like a drink and offered tea, how he could refuse that. Simply nodding his head, he watched her walk into her kitchen to start the drinks. Once she had disappeared into the kitchen, he gave a quick glance around her living room before following her into the kitchen. When he stepped into the kitchen, Lisbon was grabbing mug from one of the cupboards. He watched her for a second before heading towards the table and sat on the bar stool there. He knew that she would be a couple more minutes making the drinks, so he went back to the thoughts he was having outside her house. He didn't know why he taken the ring off his finger but it felt like that it was a good idea, and that his wife would be happy that he was trying to move on with his life, trying to be happy once again. He heard Lisbon sit across from him and hand him his mug of tea. He lifted his eyes away from his hand to take the mug from her and gave her a slight nod again. Then went back to his thoughts, he didn't hear anything that Lisbon had said to him, he was to into his thoughts. He was so into his thoughts that when he felt Lisbon grabbed his hand, he jumped slightly at the touch. But he recovered from it and grabbed a hold of her hand so that she didn't move away, she entwined their hands, and was slightly taken aback when she started to rub her fingers along his knuckles; it seemed to have a calming effect to it. He just kept staring at their hand when he felt the slight change to the rhythm her thumb was making and knew that she realized he wasn't wearing his wedding ring, so he spoke before she could.

'Lisbon….. Teresa' as he whispered her first name, her thumbs stopped moving over his finger, and she lifted her gaze up to meet his piercing blue eyes. She wasn't use to him saying her first name, to her that seemed to personal to call people by their, that's why she made her team call each other by their last name, so that they don't get emotionally involved with each other. But turning her attention back to Jane, She could see so many different emotions behind his eyes that she was scared to even look at him, but also so intrigued that she couldn't move her eyes away. She wasn't use to him being so open with his emotions, he usually hide behind a well practiced façade, so him sitting opposite her with it all showing through his eyes all she could do was sit there and continue to hold his hand as he began to speak again.

'Teresa.' He said again with a bit more confidence, and she was also starting to like the sound of it coming out of his mouth. He moved slightly and put his other hand on the one that was already one hers, and continued.

'Since I joined your team, I only had one target and that was to find Red John and kill him the way he killed my family. I was so clouded by my revenge, that I used your team to do just that. But as the years my revenge has lessened, and I see more clearly then I use to. I can start to see a future, and at first it scared the life out of me, because for the past couple of years my future involved one thing and one thing only. But now that I have had time to think about it, I'm starting to understand what I really want from life now. I mean don't get me wrong but when we catch Red John all I'm saying now might just get thrown out the window, but I can try and I'm hoping that will be enough.' Jane paused for a second, and Lisbon sat there still for a minute, before finding her voice.

'Be enough for what?' It took him a couple of second to reply to her question but when he did, she didn't know what to make of it.

'You.'


	5. Chapter 5

Disclaimer: still don't own it. But my world is slightly just watch the promo for the last episode can't wait.

Hey guys here's the next chapter for you, I no it's a short but this chapter was hell to write so I hope you enjoy it like the rest of my chapters. Mistakes are still mine. Enjoy guys.

Lisbon stared at Jane with her mouth slightly open, trying to come to terms with the implication of his confession, not really knowing what to say, Lisbon just sat there staring at Jane, waiting till he continued what he wanted to say. It only took him a couple of minutes of silence for him to continue.

'Out of everyone on the team, you managed to warm your way past all the barriers that I had built around myself after what happened. And at first I hated that I was letting you do it, but then I began to realized that I liked that you could get past, because when you got inside I started to feel again, and I liked the feeling. When I started to think about why I was letting you in, was because you were the one person I could trust you with everything. I have never had that since my wife and it did scare me, but now I welcome the feeling. I know what I'm saying is a lot to take in, but I'm hoping you will think about it, and then let me know how you feel.' All through his confession Lisbon sat there shell-shocked, not believing that Jane would lay all his feelings on the table. He was always the one who hid behind a shield, nit letting anyone in, she didn't even think he had let her in. so him saying that he had, seemed unreal. But the honesty in his voice and eyes, told her he was being serious. She knew she didn't have to think about her feelings, she has felt the same for the past year, and it wasn't going to change anytime soon, so taking a deep breath, she rested her other hand on top of his, and replied.

'Patrick, why didn't you tell me all this earlier, I could of helped. You didn't have to go through all this by yourself. But thank you for telling me now, I know it must have been hard, and it makes me happy that you trust and care for me enough to tell me. But I don't have to think about the way I feel, because even if I did I would still feel the same. But it's been a long day for both of us, and I think it would be a good idea if we got some sleep and talked about it tomorrow. You can stay here if you want, you can either have the couch or the spare room upstairs.' With that she squeezed his hand, trying to show comfort and get her point across.

Jane squeezed her hand back and nodded his head in agreement. He pulled his hands away, and instantly she missed the contact. She watched him stand and make his way over to the couch. He stripped his jacket and hung in over the back of the couch before lying down and throwing his arm over his eyes. Lisbon draw her eyes away from him and picking the mugs up, putting them into the sink, then turning around and walking into the living room. She come to stand next to Jane, seeing if he would move his arm away, and when he didn't, she ran her fingers over his cheek, he shifted slightly but still didn't move his arm away, she leant down and kissed were her fingers just were. She felt him shift, and she lifted her head to meet his eyes, and behind the blue-eyes she saw so many emotions, she wasn't sure what to think, and when he moved more, she was shocked when his lips came into contact with hers, he pulled back before she had the chance to respond, smiled at her and lifted his hand to touch her cheek, the same thing she did to him. She returned the smile, and brought her hand up to cover his on her cheek. They stared at each other for a long minute, before Lisbon leaned forward to kiss his forehead, before standing and whispering.

'Goodnight Patrick.' And then she continued up the stairs to get ready for bed. Half way up the stairs she heard his reply, but when she turned round he had his arm, smiling to herself, she went to bed.

Once Jane had told her everything, he felt like a weight had been shifted off his shoulders. He listened to what she had said, and agreed with it all, so when she said that she would sleep on it before telling him what she wanted to say, he just nodded his. Then she squeezed his hand, and that was a sign to tell him that she wasn't going anywhere, she was just tired and needed to sleep. So he squeezed her hand as a thank you and stood to go sleep on the couch. Once there he took his jacket off and hung it over the back, and when he laid down he put his arm over his eyes and listen to what Lisbon was doing. He heard her put their mugs in the sink, than heard her coming towards, but he didn't want to move he wanted to see what she would do, so he just laid there waiting. She shocked him then, when he felt her hand move against his cheek, he still didn't he felt her lips touch his cheek and he couldn't help but move. And when he did he was staring into her eyes, which is why the next move was the only thing he could think of doing, he leant forward and kissed her gently, he could tell she was shocked she he pulled back and just stared at her, he could see so many emotions going through her eyes. She broke the contact first by standing and kissing his head, before turning and whispering goodnight to him, he waited till she was half way up the stairs before replying and going back to his original position.

TBC


	6. Chapter 6

Disclaimer: still don't own it. But my world is slightly just watch the promo for the last episode can't wait.

Hey guys here's the next chapter for you, I no it's a crap chapter, and taken ages for me to get it up but my computer broke and had to wait for it to get fixed, and I wanted to get this up for you guys, sorry about the long delay, but please enjoy guys.

Jane had been laying on the couch for about an hour, he had been listening to any noise that was coming from upstairs, but there hadn't been for about 40 minutes, but he could sleep, he never could because whenever he closed his eyes he would picture his wife and child. She he had learnt that he would never get a proper night's sleep. He had been contemplating whether he should go up stairs to see if Lisbon was alright, but there was something that was holding him back but he wasn't sure what it was. So after another 10 minutes, he decided that he couldn't stay here any longer, so getting up from the couch he made his way upstairs. He tried to be as quiet as he could, and when he got to the top he breathed a sigh of relieve that none of them creaked. Looking around the hall, trying to decide which her room was, deciding that the room at the end would be hers, he made his way towards it.

He opened the door slowly, trying to make as little noise as possible. Peeking his head around the door, Jane saw Lisbon sleeping peacefully one side of the bed; she looked so beautiful just laying there that Jane couldn't take his eyes off her, and before he know what he was doing he was walking towards her. He knelt down in front of her, and couldn't help the smile that grazed his face. He brought his right hand to run along her cheek, which wasn't a very smart move as her face scrunched up at the touch and she rolled over to the other side. Sighing softly, he ran his fingers through his hair, and stood, deciding what he should do now that he was in her room, his natural instinct was to look around the room, but knowing that Lisbon would probably shoot him if she ever found out he did that, so he decided against doing that. Not really wanting to go back down stairs and be on his own, he thought about just laying on the floor next to the bed, but then thought better, as it would probably do his back in. looking down at the bed, he made his mind up he was just going to lay on the bed for a awhile, what would it hurt anyway he would just stay awake and get up and go back downstairs before Lisbon woke anyway. Nodding to himself, he slipped slowly into the bed so not to wake her and pulled the covers over himself. He put his arms behind his head and once again stared at the ceiling, and before he know it he was closing his eyes and falling asleep.

Lisbon wasn't sure what time it was when she woke, but as she shifted slightly, she felt something other than the bed below her. Slowly opening her eyes she saw somebody sleeping below her. Lifting her head up to the face of the person she saw Jane sleeping peacefully. Not sure how he had managed to get into her bed, she abruptly sat up knocking Jane awake at the same time, whose blue eyes shoot open at the movement. Lisbon just stared down and at him with questions in her eyes. And Jane obviously knew what she was saying as he started with an explanation.

'I'm sorry Lisbon, but I couldn't sleep downstairs, so I came up here to see if you were ok, and then I couldn't make myself go downstairs on my own again. I didn't think that I would sleep like I did, and that I would be able to move away from the bed before you woke up. I really am sorry, I should just go now.' He moved to get out of the bed before Lisbon reached her hand out and grabbed a hold of his wrist. He stopped and turned towards her again. She had an encouraging smile on her face before replying.

'Hey don't worry about it was just shock that's all. I'm glad you were able to get some sleep for a chance, but please don't leave I think that we should have that conversation now anyway. Get all are feeling out in the open once and for all and see what happens, if that is ok.' She looked Jane in the eyes as she finished and she could tell he was scared of what she was going to say to him, so she grabbed his hand and entwined her fingers with his, and she felt him squeeze her hand. Then she began the dreaded conversation.

'Patrick I know what you said to me last night was hard for you, but you have no idea how happy you made me feel saying all the things you said to. I didn't know that I meant that much to you. When you first joined the team I knew you were just there to get your revenge and I was fine with that, because I was just glad that I could help. But over the past year I began to realize that I didn't want to be a means to an end that I wanted you to realize that there was more to life then revenge, but I also knew that I wasn't going to happen because of what happen, and you saying that because of me you will try to get past the revenge, and I know it will be hard and I'm happy you are trying. I trust you with my life Jane, but I want you to be sure that this is really what you want.' At that Lisbon stop talking and just stared him, trying to convey her feelings through her eyes. Jane lifted his hand to cup her cheek and run his thumb along it, before replying.

'Teresa, all I can give you is that I will try to do the best thing by you, my feelings for you are too strong for me not to try, and I am trying believe me it just hard to let go of the past. So please can we give it a shot.' He was begging her with his eyes, and the sensation of his thumb was sending a shiver down her spine that she couldn't ignore, but she really didn't even want to try and ignore it, so bring her hand up to cover his, she nodded her head and lent forward to brush her lips across his.

Im sorry if this chapter sucks but it was hard to write.

Please review

Tbc


	7. Chapter 7

Disclaimer: still don't own it.

Hey guys here's the next chapter for you, sorry about the really long delay but work has been hectic and then my comp decided it would break, and it took ages for it to get fixed, but its fixed now and here Is the next chappie.

The initial contact of her lips, were a shock to Jane, but he got over that shock pretty quickly and began to kiss her back, moving his hand from her cheek to tangle into her hair, Deeping the kiss. He felt her hands move up his stomach to rest on his chest, grabbing a hold of his shirt and bringing him closer to her. Just as he brought his other hand to wrap around her waist so that her could lie her down on the bed, a ringing in the background brought them back to reality. Pulling away slowly, Jane ran his hand along Lisbon's cheek once again, before given her a slight smile and letting her get up to answer her phone.

Flipping the phone open, Lisbon read Cho's name on the screen before pressing the button and putting it to her ear.

'Lisbon' she listened to Cho tell her they had a new case, and where it was, she then told him that she would tell Jane and meet them at the scene, before hanging up and turning to Jane. He was sitting up with his back resting on the headboard, watching her intently. She smiled at him before walking over to the bed, and sitting next to him. Taking his hand in hers she spoke.

'We have to go to work, but we will continue this later.' She squeezed his hand, before leaning forward and brushing her lips on his. The kiss only lasted a few seconds, before she drew back, smiled and got up from the bed, and left the room.

Jane watched her leave, before standing from the bed, looking down at his rumpled suit, trying in vain to push out some of the creases, giving up he walked out of her room and headed towards the living room. He stopped at the top of the stairs, when he noticed Lisbon straightening the cushions on the couch, before turning to the door. She stopped abruptly as she turned and looked up at him; she smiled at him before motioning him down with her head. He returned her smile and started towards her. She meet him at the bottom of the steps, and once he was standing in front of her, he wrapped his arms around her in a hug, and loved the feel of her in his arms. He felt her wrap her arms around him, before stepping away and looking at him, giving him a small smile she gave him a quick kiss and stepped towards the door, only to stop when Jane started talking.

'Do you mind if we stop off at my house first, I'm thinking I should at least change before going into work.' Lisbon gave him the once over, before nodding her head and giving him a sweet smile and turning around and walking out the front door. Jane watched her leave before shaking his head and following her out, closing the door behind him. When he reached the car Lisbon was already in the driving seat watching him as he opened the door, sat down and pulled his seatbelt on, once he was situated he turned to Lisbon and smiled at her, she returned the smile before reaching over and grabbing his hand and giving it a quick squeeze, before letting go and turning the car on and pulling away.

Pulling up in front of Jane's house, Lisbon turned to Jane again, and watched so many different emotions cross his face, before he turned to her nodded his slightly then turned and got out the car and headed towards the front door. Once he was there he turned towards Lisbon and held his finger up signaling that he would be back out in a minute, she nodded her head in return and watched him close the door. Lisbon turned the engine off and waited for him to return.

Jane always hated coming back to his house, but it also kept him on the path he was on, and reminded him why he was doing, not that he ever needed to be reminded what he had done to his family, but it help. Looking around the empty space of his house he walked up the stairs and towards the bedroom at the end of the hall. Every t_ime he got near the door, he always flashed back to that night, the note on the door, and the dread running through his veins, shaking his head, he turned the door handle and enter the room. The smiley face was the first thing he saw, then the lonely mattress lying underneath it, walking past them both he headed towards his closet, picking out one of the few suits he own, he started to change. Once he had changed his suit he headed to the bathroom to give his face a quick wash, before heading back down the stairs and out to the car._

_Lisbon waited patiently for Jane, staring at her surroundings, taking every little detail she could. She wasn't really sure how long he had been, but she heard the front door close and she turned to see Jane walking slowly to the car, his face showing no emotion, he just opened the door and sat down without saying anything. She watched him for a few seconds while he stared at the house, obviously in his own world. And when he turned towards her, she suddenly saw how much this house affected him. She saw the hurt, lose, anger and finally the guilt. She wanted nothing more than to bring him to her and take it all away from him, but she knew that could never happen, so she settled for grabbing his hand and giving it a squeeze. She felt him squeeze it back, before she let go and turned the car back on._

_The ride to the crime scene was quiet, but somewhere near the middle of it Jane grabbed her hand and didn't let it go, and she didn't tell him to stop as she knew he was trying to get some form of comfort out of her. But once they pulled up to the scene. He gave her hand one last squeeze before letting go and getting out of the car. She followed suit, turning the engine off and getting out, she walked around to the front and meet Jane, and they both walked towards the scene, as close as they could get to each other without actually touching._

Im sorry if this chapter sucks but I tried my best. And I just wanted to give u guys something.

Please review

Tbc


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